I’ve read that the best kind of love is one in which the soul is awakened. I am not in love, and I am unsure if it’s indeed my soul, but something endlessly divine has been awakened inside of me. It started when the best kind of friend (One in which you have to build a solid foundation of banter in order to avoid a considerable amount of maudlin conversations detailing how truly perfect they are in your eyes.) Confessed her feelings for me. Instantly I was 7 years old again, up way past my bedtime, and watching my first Sunrise. God has colored the entire sky perfectly, and I still couldn’t color inside the lines of a singular square I thought. I had never seen or appreciated such beauty before. I knew that I never wanted to miss another, and I vowed that I wouldn’t. I promised forever to something I didn’t know existed, wanted, and possibly even needed moments earlier.
You see, What I’m trying to say is that… this friend was everything Magical in what was my first Sunrise.
I became entranced with ideas, and possibilities that I didn’t know existed moments earlier. I saw forever in a world I had previously thought to be fleeting. I saw the everlasting beauty in everything that was her. I was effortlessly lost in the wave of newfound passion. I put a grim emphasis on the term wavebecause waves come and go in an ocean of forevers and foundations.
With that said, My 7 year old self, was peacefully asleep, on time, and couldn’t even manage to capture the sunrise the very next morning.
As for my best kind of friend, maudlin conversations and thoughts of perfection possibilities quickly faded back to banter.
So here I stand with a shot filled with an ocean of Hennessy toasting to wishes of being her ocean of forevers.
Last night I lay in a beautiful girl’s bed, whom by some mistake made by the universe, I have been blessed enough to call mine for some time now. However that’s besides the point, and simply my mind wandering to the one I love. The true point is that I lay in her bed last night a frustrated dreamer. I lay in her bed, and gave way to human nature. Being that I was so caught up in thoughts of a better future, that I was not enjoying the very good, and fortunate present. We all give way to this part of nature at some point in our lives, and that is completely fine, so long as we don’t lose ourselves to it. Because losing ourselves to anything, love included, is the greatest crime one can commit on oneself. Staying on subject, as I lay, I began truly thinking. In a conclusion of thoughts, or more so a peak, being that i never stop truly thinking, I decided that life was a neighborhood. A very nice in some parts, bad in others, long neighborhood, in which we all have our respective houses. Even if we don’t know which one yet, we all still have our respective house. This is important, or maybe it isn’t, but in my mind this whole thought is important, and needs to be put in words, and in turn read. We also have our own respective speed bumps in said neighborhood of life, and for me college is that, well those speed bumps. You see I know where I want to go in this neighborhood, and in truth it may be a long ways into the neighborhood, and I may be met with the neighbors of “Job I don’t really want.” and “Rejection.” etc . . . but I am ready to begin that journey nonetheless. That is without the constant, one after the other speed bumps that college is for me. For some people speed bumps are meant to keep you safe, other’s around you safe, or let you know you’re going a little or alot to fast. For others, including me all speed bumps do is slow you down, from getting to a destination that you know is extremely plausible for you to arrive at had the speed bump not been there at all. I realize that I could be onto something, or plainly another college student who clearly has no idea about the real world. This remains to be seen, and I won’t make any rash decisions. I’ll also admit that during my giving way to Human nature all I could think about was how the speed bump of college was simply slowing me down, but as I begin to find myself again, I can say that the speed bump could also be keeping me safe. This remains to be seen as well, but only time will tell. “But only time will tell.” This can honestly be the answer to any question, but that’s a discussion for another time. Getting back on subject for one last time, I wholeheartedly thought this needed to be read, I hope after doing so, you share my sentiments. I also hope that we all make it to our respective houses in the “Good” part of the neighborhood.
In all honesty I cannot recollect how many times the question of whether I believe in soul mates have reached my ears, and words have exited my mouth without second thought. It is truly my belief that there is always some defining moment in life to where all bad habits are broken. Some of these defining moments come in death or near death situations, but if we are lucky as well as patient enough, they might come on beautiful, warm, breezeless nights like mine happened to yesterday. I was asked the familiar question, but thought reached me before vocal output did. Instead of the usual No I would give, a new answer seemed to be making its way to my lips.
“Yes, I do.”
Why didn’t I see it before? The answer could be that I just had not given in thought nor been very interested in the subject, which looking back on it now seems to be completely ludicrous to be lackluster about there possibly being someone else put on the earth, not solely for you, but in a loving sense for you.
Is it so hard to believe that there is a soul out there, whom thinks the same as you, feels in the unique ways we all as individuals claim we feel. Yes, there are billions of people in the world, what are the chances of your soul mate and you ending up in the same place right? That’s exactly it though, wouldn’t these similarities in individualism, ideas, thoughts, souls…. Not lead the both of you to end up on the same social network, or possibly even the same place in the world? If my theory is correct, and the theory of soul mates is correct the answer is yes. Maybe its not chance that were in college with a girl/guy that makes our heart flutter, or happen to strike up a conversation with a random girl/guy which happens to be the best human interaction you’ve had in days, and if your being honest with yourself months. Lets not confuse chance with fate, but let’s also not confuse destiny with simple accidents. Mainly though, let us think, and let us believe in one of the most beautiful and wanderlust theories in life.